Lots of Prayers

Praying has been such an important part of my life and God has always provided and taken care of us in so many ways but right now he is saying the ever famous "WAIT". And I am not a patient person. I have several prayers lately and I know He is not ignoring me but He is telling me to hold on, He has it under control but still it is hard for me to give up that control when I am trying so hard to stay positive and keep the good momentum I had before. 

I am really dragging on my work outs, just making excuses, and I hate when people make excuses so I kicked my own butt today for that. I have cheated too and eaten some McDonalds and Arbys, now I didn't eat near what I would have before but still need to not go there, it is just so easy to grab it with the kids instead of making a mess in the kitchen or eating another microwave low fat meal. But for the most part I am staying on track. 

Right here and now I am promising that I am back on track. God has a plan, I am giving him my worries and my weight loss and I am going to go back to being the positive, happy and SKINNIER person I am now. Thanks to so many of you who tell me that I look good and that you are proud of me, it really really helps. 

Also please pray for Kevin's grandma, she is having surgery to remove the last of the cancer from her body and we all just pray that things go well and that the cancer will be gone for good and she comes through it all feeling much better.

I still feel fat

I have so far to go people. I looked at all the pictures from Christmas and although I am smaller than previous pictures I am still the fat one in all of them. It is motivating, it makes me want to work hard. I feel good at the moment cause I just worked out for almost 2 hours. But I didn't get a work out in this weekend even though it was a gorgeous day on Saturday. I wanted to go jog so badly but we were having a family Christmas so I didn't get to.  Well I need to get some rest, Ruby is sick again so I expect to be up half the night again. Keep me in your prayers, I can't do this alone. Over Christmas I got so many compliments and it made me feel great. I have to keep going and not give up, I need to work harder.

It's a new year!

Hmmm, I wonder what my new year's resolution will be...

My resolution is that next year, for the first time in my adult life, losing weight will not be my new year's resolution. I have to tell the truth, December has been tough and I probably only worked out like 6 times. I was so sick for the first two weeks, with sick kids as well. Then all the prep for Christmas and then Kevin arriving and then all the festivities. And I also admit I ate too much but still a whole lot less than I would have in the past. And I am still off regular pop! Now things have calmed back down. We can finally get a good schedule going. I truly miss jogging though and I am so ready to get back to it, but the weather is not cooperating. I hate cold and it is going to be cold for a while. I really want to do a 5K, that is my other resolution. I am just really afraid of it cause anyone I know who has done it can actually run and I don't run and I think I would be the last one behind tons of people. 

One of my greatest Christmas gifts was my size 12 jeans! Yes size 12, my 14's are now falling down, so it looks like my bad month didn't ruin me. I was doing a dance in the fitting room cause they fit so well! I can't wait to keep going down. I am going to use some Christmas money to buy some more Alli, cause I really think it is helping. I also bought (with Christmas money) a 5-lb weight ball, more (smaller) work out clothes, 2 new dvd's, and we got the Fit TV Channel now so I have all kinds of work outs. You should see my DVR, it has like 15 workouts recorded. I can never get bored again! 

My goals:

lose more weight (duh)

size 8 by this summer!

jog a 5K

jog a 5K in under 40 minutes!

Things I want to do when I am smaller:

buy a cute swimsuit

go to Vegas

ride a mechanical bull

get pictures taken

try on my wedding dress (if I am an 8 than it will be too big!)

I wish you all a very happy and healthy new year. I hope some of you can be inspired like me and just do it, if I can anyone can.