Last year when I watched the biggest loser I would watch it while I ate or while just sitting there on the couch, thinking that I wasn't quite as big as those people. This year though I am changing that. Tonight while I watched it (Two 2 hour shows minus the commercials) I decided to change that couch potato image and I worked out while I watched it. I did 100 crunches, which is my new goal, to do 100 crunches every night, and then do more as time goes by. It is amazing how much easier they have gotten. I also did a good arm work out with my 5 pound weights and then a few other things. And on top of all that I got all my laundry done, folded and upstairs. I feel very accomplished!
Some moments I am feeling great and noticing small changes but then I see so many things that I hate. My flabby stomach that I am scared will never go away, my huge thighs, my back fat and much more. I just am so tired of being disgusted with myself and I am so impatient. I am also deathly afraid of the scale, like you wouldn't believe. So many times before I have worked hard to lose weight and then gotten on that scale and seen little to no change so I just give up. The last time I got on the scale at my parents house it said 209 and I haven't been back on it in a few weeks. I want to see if I have made progress cause it feels like I have and unless people are liars many have said that they can see a difference. I just know it will destroy me if I haven't lost another 5 or more. I know, I know, it is gradual but other people who work this hard see results and I have talked to doctors and I am doing everything right. Please pray that this is working, it just has to, I really am scared.
3 comments:
Em,
I am so proud of you! And I am going to keep saying it! I am glad that you are looking at things differently. You are using your time in a much more efficiant way. I know it is hard to do, you are tired at the end of the day and just want to sit down and relax. I am in the same boat. But that makes you even better at this than many. Just to get out there you are ahead of the game! You have also inspired me. I started running again. It has been about a year since I have realy ran. Yeaterday I "ran" almost 3 miles. I think it was like 2.7, but 'almost 3' sounds better to me :). I am doing it by time, not distance. That took me about 40 minutes. I walked some and ran some. But I feel really good and accomplished, and I like that feeling, and I know you do to. I think the more you do, the mroe you like to feel that way. The same with me. Keep it up! You are unknowingly pulling me along with you! Thank you!
PS, I just realized that it says 'anonymous,' It's me... Meghan!
Way to go, Emily! You have a really good outlook on things. You can do this! I've had a bad couple of weeks on my end, but I hope to jump right back on track this coming week! We will do this, girl!
~Tonja
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